In today’s soul talk I’m going to address feelings of jealousy and ways we can manage them. And for the soul craft, I have a card I made for the new mother or the mother to be.
Manage Your Jealous Feelings
I think we all have feelings of jealousy in our lives. You know the tight feeling in your gut when your friend manages to get that new job you were hoping for. Or a new gorgeous house and you’re trying to survive in yours that is in need of a desperate remold.
Everyone is living their own lives and sometimes if feels like you are being left behind or that you’ll never have what they have.
And even if we don’t want to, we can’t help but be jealous.
How Social Media Plays With Our Insecurities
I’m sure that before everything and everyone went online we still struggled with jealousy and insecurities. We’re still human beings but with social media it seems to have magnified our insecurities. It’s in our faces all the time. And it’s almost like we can’t help but notice.
We see the Instagram feeds and everything in their lives look so perfect. Even if we know that it took them a hundred shots to get that perfect shot, we still look at it and think if only.
- If only I was that rich.
- If only I was that skinny.
- If only I could dress that well.
- If only I had that talent.
But how do we know that the picture is true life? Don’t you think that everyone else struggles with something? Behind the scenes they could be unhealthy, have an addiction, struggle with anxiety, or have a secret debt situation.
They’re not going to show you that. Well most don’t although there are people on social media that show you all. Like Rachel Hollis and Mel Robins are a couple influencers that I listen to and follow.
They preach perfect is not the answer. They talk of how you can’t judge your life against others because you are on your own journey.
I listen to a podcast called The Life Coach School by Brooke Castillo and it’s all about living your best life. She gives you tools on how to manage life in your best way. She had one podcast that I didn’t really understand. She said if your judging someone else than you are judging yourself. I didn’t get it.If you are judging someone else, you are also judging yourself. Click To Tweet
I knew I hated myself when I would judge someone else for their happiness. I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t be happy for them getting something they wanted or achieved. Sometimes it would be something I didn’t even want yet I found myself almost angry that they got what they wanted but I didn’t. Stupid huh?
Mirror, Mirror On The Wall
Then I read the book You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero and she wrote that if you are envious of someone else it is a mirror of yourself. In another words if someone had something and it bothered me it was because it touched a chord of something inside of me. And it wasn’t even about them.
It was making me feel less than because of something inside of me. And it got me to thinking. Anytime I would feel that yucky feeling of jealousy or envy, I asked myself what is it that she has that makes me feel jealous.
For instance when I was a kid, my Grandma lived a mile down the road from us. She lived on a farm and my father farmed the land after my Grandpa got sick and passed. It was nothing for my brother and me to spend the weekend with her playing cards and having fun. But it was no secret that my brother was my Grandma’s favorite. He was everyone’s favorite because he was blessed with a charisma personality and he just made people feel like they matter. He had a kind heart.
Still, I envied him. Instead of figuring out how to be more like that, I was jealous of his relationship with my Grandma. And I don’t think she loved me any less. He was just her favorite.
What sucked was that she would take him on trips with her. It made me jealous. In looking back it seems so trivial. But here we are.
I still have a pretty good relationship with my brother. He and I took care of my Mom the most and share a special bond. And even if I was jealous of him he will always be the one brother that holds a special place in my heart.
The point is that he has the personality that I wish I had. I wish I could start up a conversation with anyone and draw people to me naturally like he can. But he doesn’t have the gift of the written word like I do.
We can all be green with jealousy
How to Manage Your Feelings Of Jealousy
First have an honest conversation with yourself. Ask why. What do they have that you want? You might have to do a bit of digging because it might be something you lack or buried deep inside of you.
Then get a blank piece of paper and journal about it. Write on that paper everything you are feeling. All the good, bad and ugly. Get it out of you. Studies have shown that if you actually put pen to paper, it works better than typing it out. It’s like getting the guts of that feeling out of your mind and on to paper.
Next read what you wrote and ask yourself if you really believe this to be true. If you get it out of your head the truth may be revealed. It may show you that your subconscious is telling you nothing but lies. Some if it may even seem outrageous, but now you have it out of your head and your feelings and thoughts won’t be running amok in your head.
Lastly, make a plan. Now that you know what is causing this jealousy you can work out on how to resolve those unwanted feelings. Turn those feelings into something that serves you. As long as it doesn’t affect you, what others have and do isn’t any of your business anyways.
Release it. Let it go. And move on to something that does serve you. Make it something that you really want and believe in and move toward that.
Jealousy is a nasty feeling. At least I think it is. I don’t like to feel that way. And we are in control of our feelings and can make our lives and this world a better place.
This New Arrival card will make it a great day for someone special while boosting your mood too.
New Arrival Card
For this card I started with green cardstock as the base.
I had picked up the baby patterned cardstock a while back from JoAnn’s and used that for the accent.
Two strips of a wide bright yellow ribbon were attached to the card.
Using Cricut Design Space I drew out the words New Arrival and drew it out with a green Cricut pen on gray cardstock using my Cricut Explorer.
Then I used this umbrella die from In’spire by Spellbinders with my Dance in the Rain card to cut it out.
This was attached to the top ribbon centered more to the left.
For the bottom ribbon I used the same umbrella die and for the top of the umbrella I used one of the patterned dies and the patterned cardstock.
Of course I always have to bling up my cards so I used white gems that were colored with a green sharpie and decorated both ribbons. This card will be a special addition to your gift for the new mother.
When you get jealous, how do you manage your feelings? Drop a comment below and be sure to share this post to help others.
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