The Empty Nest Syndrome is real and I wanted to address it in this weeks Soul Talk and how to over come it. Then with the Soul Craft, I show another Mother’s Day Card I made. You can find the card below.
As a mother you have devoted so much time to your children. They are nurtured when they are young to be these amazing adults that you can call your own.
But there is a trade off to this.
When they become adult children, they tend to forget you as their lives take over. And that’s okay. It’s expected, but there are times that you wish they would remember how much you’ve given them.
Would it be so hard for them to call or text you once in a while and preferably when it’s not when they need something? I mean really, with the way technology is today, there are so many ways they could reach out to you.
Normally if you have daughters, that connection and the conversations are a little more plentiful than when you have sons.
I know. I have two sons of my own. And before you hate on me, I want to say that I’m extremely proud of them. They are hard workers, problem solvers, and live on their own. Even if it did take a long time to get there.
But that is another conversation.
In the US we are coming on to Mother’s Day. I used to make the day all about my Mom or my husband’s Mother, but they are both deceased now. So here I sit with the Mother’s Day cards I made, and no one to give them to.
And they are super cute.
Sons vs Daughters
My mom had three sons too. And then came me. The only girl of the family. My Mother in Law had three sons and no girls. Because boys tend to start their own careers or families, especially in the old days as they say, the mothers were left behind so to speak.
So I went out of my way to make their days more special because I felt bad for them. And I knew one day with two boys of my own, I would be in the same boat.
I don’t fault my boys for not remembering me or taking time for me. They are busy. But it still pricks you in the heart a bit.
I’ll still get the Happy Mother’s Day text and that is fine.
I know, it seems like I’m whining and I guess I am a bit.
But do you feel me?
A Son Is A Son Until He Takes A Wife
I have great relationships with my sons. And I knew that when they grew up, they would build their own families. I want them to be a rock for their family, and to raise their own children. I was prepared, until I wasn’t.
So the question is; what can we do when our children grow into adults that don’t need us anymore?
Make Your Home Your Own Again
Even though my boys are out on their own it didn’t happen seamlessly. They have been in and out of my home several times. Each time, I had to readjust when they came back and again when they left.
And if they came upon tough times, I would do it again.
But when they left I made my home my own once again. I turned one bedroom into a craft room and another into my office. It didn’t happen overnight, but I slowly made it into the home of my husband and me.
Clear Out Old Clutter
Have you noticed that through the years of raising your children, you have accumulated so many things? Things you haven’t used or needed in years? Our basement was a mess of toys that my kids have abandoned.
My youngest turned into a golfer and collected three sets of golf clubs. I have no idea why he needed that many and obviously since he left them behind to collect dust, neither did he.
My oldest loved to fix things. Except once he took them apart, he didn’t have the ambition to reassemble them. We had tools and parts everywhere. He loved to build computers so we had parts of a computer I couldn’t even name.
So one day we had our boys come over and they helped us to clean the garage and the basement. All the things I saved thinking they would want them someday, they tossed.
I realized the stuff I was hanging onto for old time sake, would just be tossed or given away once my husband and I walked to the great beyond. So I have been on the task of clearing out the old clutter.
Which is what brings me to the next suggestion.
Be Careful Of What You Are Filling Your Home With
Let’s face it. Sometimes we are looking to fill a void. When are children leave, sometimes we turn to things to fill us up. After we have purchased said things, we decide we really didn’t want it in the first place. The really sad part is it didn’t fill us up at all. So it lays abandoned collecting dust. Is your home as dusty as mine? Sorry, I digress.
Really be sure that it’s something that will bring meaning to your life and not filling a void. Things will make you happy for an instant but feelings will keep coming back until we work on them and face them.
Things take money and unless it’s been something you’ve been dreaming about for ages, don’t spend useless money. Spend money that is going to truly bring you joy. Make it have meaning.
Give Yourself Permission to Soar
Hitting middle age can be bittersweet. Our children are off discovering life. We see our parents aging or in my case already deceased. Don’t waste any more time. At this age, you have the luxury of life experiences on one hand. Yet on the other hand you realize that life is not a guarantee. Forgive me for being morbid.
Don’t waste your time letting your mind tell you that you are too old. If anything the story you should be telling yourself is, it’s now or never.
If you want to take that trip, take it.
If you want to start a blog or write a book, write it.
If you want to sell your house, sell it.
Do whatever you dream of doing. Take the first steps to make that dream a reality. You deserve it. You’ve put in the time.
Someday, if you haven’t already, you’ll realize that you are the next generation to go. I’m in that spot now. My husband is in that spot now. A lot of my friends are in that spot now.
There is no waiting around anymore. If you don’t have to take care of your parents right now, take the time to dream your best life. Take the time to start to mold to the best version of yourself.
And let your children live their lives because you will be busy living yours.
Another Mother’s Day card.
I started with a yellow base and put a blue sheet of cardstock on top of it.
Then I searched through Cricut Design Space for the Best Mother’s Day Ever. I changed it from cut to draw and used a silver Cricut pen and drew it on vanilla white cardstock. I love their silver pens.
Using a Nested rectangle die from Scrapbook.com I cut it out.
I put the rectangle on the top of the card.
A bright yellow ribbon was attached below that.
And a thin silver ribbon on top of the yellow ribbon.
Using the same paper flowers I used in the last Mother’s Day card, I colored them with a blue, pink and yellow Sharpie.
I attached the large flower below the salutation and the smaller ones on the bottom. I also colored clear gems in the same colors and attached them on to both top corners of the salutation.
A beautiful Mother’s Day card.
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Drop a comment below and let me know if you are going through the empty nest syndrome and how well you are coping and if I can help you.